Allow me to (re)introduce myself

24 things about me that I decided it was crucial to share

25) I LOVE a mirror selfie 😂

At this point, my subscriber split is about 30/70 people who know me IRL vs people who don’t. So it felt like a good time to give you a better idea of who’s on the other end of this keyboard¹.

Here are 24 things², some of which may even be a surprise to those that I do know IRL.

1. I set fire to my entire life at the end of 2021 and left to go travelling ‘for 4 months’. I was gone for just under 3 years. I’m still not really settled/based anywhere and am figuring that out. Slowly.

   
   London is in my bones, Rio is in my heart. The idea of being in one place terrifies me, but the logistics of splitting my life between locations are hard³.

2. I’ve done a lot of energy work, spiritual shenanigans, plant medicine, you name it⁴. One day, I’ll start a new Substack to write about some of my experiences, but I have enough to do for now. In the meantime, I spoke about some of it on this podcast - it was 3 years ago⁵, so I’ve done quite a lot more since⁶ - but it’ll give you an idea, if you’re interested.

3. I’m an only child. Obviously.

4. I write erotica on the side⁷ and make considerably more money from that than I likely ever will from NBWI. I manage my feelings about that daily 😂.

5. I am autistic AF and have almost crippling ADHD. I had to self-diagnose both of these in my 40s⁸. This blows my mind, as my symptoms for both have been textbook my entire life⁹.

6. I’ve never been married or had kids. I’m actually pretty keen to get married¹⁰, but would be the first to acknowledge that if I’d done it any time before now, I would be Extremely Divorced¹¹, with Miserable Children. I am pretty sure¹² that the Universe is going to knock me up with twins¹³ when I’m 53 and fuck up my tranquility.

7. Most of my friends have never seen me drunk. I only drink when I feel like it. And I rarely feel like it. I find it almost impossible to turn a pickleback down though.

8. Despite this, I intend to sit my Diploma of Wine¹⁴ at some point in the future¹⁵.

9. The question I most dread is “Where are you from?”. Not because it’s a secret, but because I know an incredibly boring and somewhat confusing conversation is about to ensue¹⁶.

10. The question I dread second most is “What would your last meal on Earth be?”. I am pathologically incapable of answering this. I’d need a 96-hour rolling buffet of delicious and specific foodstuffs.

    And then I get in my head about the fact that one day I will have my last meal on Earth and I probably won’t know it when it’s happening and what if it’s shit and then I have to stop thinking for a bit¹⁷.

11. The question I dread third most¹⁸ is “So… What do people call you for short?”. They don’t. My name is Anne-Marie. Anything else hurts my soul¹⁹. The 2 exceptions to this are my 2 oldest friends, each of whom has their own nickname for me. My love for them overcomes this offence, somehow.

12. Tokyo is my favourite city in the world.

13. I think about the concept of Time more than is healthy²⁰.

14. My mum’s English, my dad’s French²¹. I grew up in the UK but am bilingual. I reject virtually all French culture that isn’t gastronomic or cosmetic. Unless I’m witnessing British people drunk abroad, at which point I reject British culture in its entirety.

15. I love the Internet more than anything else in the world. And also blame it for at least 60% of all that’s currently wrong with the world.

16. I’ve completed Skyrim to 98% four times²²

17. I objectively understand that astrology is obviously bullshit and yet find it to be weirdly and specifically accurate an unignorable amount of the time. The dichotomy of this plagues my existence.

18. You can trace a straight line between every procedure I’ve ever had and a romantic disappointment. If injected with truth serum, I would admit that I believe that every relationship/situationship that failed was because I wasn’t beautiful enough. The extent to which this means I back my personality is hilarious to me.

19. Dogs, cats and the under-10s often get weirdly obsessed with me. Some over-10s too.

    16 b) [Which reminds me] 3 different men - each of whom I’d already declined to go out with - have sent unsolicited love gifts²³ to my place of work.

20. My degree is in social anthropology - people fascinate me - but I love money²⁴ and my actual career is in Finance.

21. Being on the beach is my purpose. I’m pretty certain of this. Sunbathing naked is as close to bliss as I’ve ever been.
    (Top 3 beaches: Formentera, Zipolite, Ipanema²⁵)

22. I’m part-qualified as a breathwork facilitator²⁶. I have no plans to ever do this as a career, but I think it’s a beautiful practice.

23. I qualified as a make-up artist WAY back in 2013. I also have no plans to ever do this as a career²⁷.

24. Every year, on my birthday, I ask my friends (aka the people who are supposed to love me most, who remain weirdly resistant to this, conceptually) to tell me what their favourite thing is about me. Answers vary, but are majority split between: my laugh, my boobs, my audacity.

1. I remain unbelievably grateful to all who take a chance on me here 😊😘

2. It was supposed to be 20. The fact that I felt it was critical to keep all 24 probably tells you everything you need to know about me, right there.

3. I chose this and am not looking for sympathy :)

4. It’s not a competition :). But I am curious and have had the benefit of a lot of free time.

5. HOW???? HOW WAS THIS THREE YEARS AGO???

6. I *did* take bufo again, for example.

7. No, before you ask.

8. And then had those diagnoses confirmed.

9. I could talk/rage for WEEKS about the state of autism diagnosis for women.

10. Applications welcome.

11. There is, of course, nothing wrong with being divorced, but it is a lot of paperwork.

12. Genuinely.

13. When I say the Universe, I don’t think this is going to be an Immaculate Conception and I anticipate The Man Of My Dreams being very much involved, but I suspect it will be a curveball when I least expect it. Although I’m now expecting it. So I don’t know exactly where that leaves me 😂.

14. I have a Distinction in WSET Level 2.

15. I am large, I contain multitudes.

16. I thought about putting it here, but it’s as boring and confusing in print as it is in conversation.

17. See #5.

18. Last one, I promise.

19. This includes those of you who call me AMD, for ref.

20. See #5.

21. They were penpals. That’s how they met. It’s NUTS. They’re still together. They are also NUTS.

22. Including the DLCs.

23. A tree (like, a giant fucking tree), a DVD and a purple dog. The tree and the dog were totally mystifying, conceptually.

The jar of Marmite did not form part of the gift. I would have preferred a jar of Marmite, TBH. The hand-crafted name tag (my initials) was attached by him when he sent it and he had written his initials on the other side. He and I had never talked about dogs - purple or otherwise, although purple is my favourite colour, which I also don’t think I had ever told him.- and I had certainly never expressed any interest in a velvet-covered moulded resin greyhound.

24. No, really. I LOVE it. Not quite as much as I love the Internet, but at least as much as.

25. Brazil’s puritanical approach to naked sunbathing is one of the banes of my existence.

26. I hope to complete it in 2026 - 2025 is going to be over before I know it…

27. I have a habit of taking my hobbies comically seriously. See #5.